I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize
