Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
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