She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
