So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
Who put my cat in the fridge?
Randomize
