if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
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