my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
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