what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
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