so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
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