i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Randomize
