i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Randomize
