But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
Randomize
