I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
Randomize
