I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
