Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
Randomize
