I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
Randomize
