I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize
