He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
