I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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