went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
