Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
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