i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
Randomize
