Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
