hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Randomize