I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
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