so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
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