She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
