I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
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