yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize
