Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
the raccoons are back...
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