Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
