I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize
