I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
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