They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
Randomize