i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
operation harelip BJ is a go
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
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