you would pick up someone in the library
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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