everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
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