awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
