We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
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