We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
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