So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize