it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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