I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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