There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
They should really pass out barf bags in church
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize
