My nipple is on Facebook.
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Randomize
