The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
Randomize
