I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
Randomize
