sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
