Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
it was like his penis was on wheels.
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
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