Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
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