We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
Randomize
