How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Randomize
