I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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